School Carnival 2013

When I think back to my school carnival growing up two images pop up: confetti eggs and the ping pong ball game where you could WIN A GOLDFISH! (Needless to say this was the parents' favorite game as well). 

I mean, think about it. You could find your best, most treasured friends and smash confetti-filled eggs on their head. It's the elementary version of "I love you man!" The more loved you were the more confetti you had plastered to your sweaty face (and the more Advil you needed later). And the goldfish game, well, I probably don't need to tell you why this caused frenzied excitement amongst us little people. Hello! It was a way to circumvent the parents! 

kid: I want a fish

parent: no

kid: I won a fish

parent: crap

As an animal-crazed child I was thrilled to have any sort of animal beneath my careful husbandry. Unfortunately, with a younger sibling, their long term survival rate waaaaas not so good. I never got to reach the point where my mom had to nag me to scrub the bowl. They were long gone to the big toilet in the sky by then. I simply rinsed out the bowl and awaited next year's victim...errr..fish.

Well, the fish game has been axed. (I heard vague whisperings of a parent uprising and some tank scum smeared on protestors bodies but these are all, of course, rumors...) I am glad so say that the annual ritual of attempting to concuss your very best friend still remains. Shelby might need a few more years to embrace this particular aspect of the carnival. Her bent is more towards the tamer entertainments of the carnival.

1. Sugar! (let's call it "dinner" kids)

2. The Petting Zoo 

The only way to pry my kids away from the animals was with more sugar. 

Vicious cyle.

It's a miracle he still has all five fingers...

Katy Rodeo Night

Katy Rodeo Night. What a fun night with the family.

What could possibly go wrong?

It all began well. Kids dug up their city slicker hats, and I put the most rugged outfit I could find on our 18 month old (which was a turtleneck with a Moose in a tent. Yes, I realize this was a sad attempt at "country" but have I mentioned that I've really let go here people?). Then we went to McDonalds where Shelby got a Barbie Happy Meal toy.

The joy trajectory shot up after that one.

And then, the fatal error.

We decided to go pet the animals BEFORE buying our tickets. La de da let's take our time and teach the kids the pig names (Blue Butt was the favorite breed. Shocker.). Then...

 A DISASTER OF EPIC PROPORTIONS

(sweet innocent family totally unaware of their fate)

SOLD OUT!

Our kids stood there looking a little confused. Like this was some sort of joke b/c they all had their gear on. Think quick mom! Let's go to the carnival kids!

We walked all the way over only to realize (dum dum duuummmmm) it was a cash only operation and all I had was a credit card. 

So there our kids stood. No rodeo. Staring at all the flashing lights with hints of funnel cake and cotton candy tickling their noses. 

The joy trajectory has completely bottomed out and begins to slide into dangerous territory.

And here is where I reach my finest (or lowest depending on how you view it) moment. Before they are completely unreachable at the bottom of the child angst spiral, I make them an offer.

Hey, kids how about I go buy you something at Target?

Moaning stops.

Joy trajectory ceases it's downward slide.

I begin to paint a picture of the wide, glistening aisles full of innumerable goodies from which they may choose.

Twenty minutes later we are headed home with a Fancy Nancy book and a Ninja Turtle T-Phone.

Not exactly the night I had envisioned but all was well in the end. Lesson learned for next year.

Wyatt the next day:"This horse is as tough as a nut."

We "Tri"ed really hard last weekend...

...and now we are tired.

...

First of all, let me state that my daughter requested this triathlon herself. As a matter of fact, I told her "no" until she could ride her bike without training wheels. Two weeks later, she is training wheel free and lining up for her open water swim. 

In a lake. 

That was brown. 

By herself.

Yes, my six year old hopped in without any hesitation (once I told her there were no fish in it which was a lie hard to maintain once we got there and multiple people were fishing on the other bank...)

Headed to the water here. She was the last in line b/c she had no official time (translation: every other child in the event had already done this before and therefore had a time.)

Fearsome Competitor!

She's off!

I wonder if her curls caused any drag in the water...

Burnin' up some rubber!

(It was during the biking portion I observed two things: Shelby is getting a little big for her bike and there were some kid bikes out there that were NOT from Walmart or Academy if you know what I'm sayin')

I straight up was having to fight back tears as she crossed the finish line. 

And now (drumroll please)... Mommy's Triathlon!


Me and my training partner (whose crazy idea it was to run the tri in the first place and has given me serious cause to question our friendship during the month of August).

I feel the need to also mention that Genevieve is nursing her THIRD child who is 6 MONTHS OLD! I personally feel she deserves a special medal.

Nothing makes the other triathletes quiver in their shoes like a "selfie" before the race. 

(BTW do you see the gal's hinney on the right photo bombing our pic?)

Let me give you the play by play from here on out along with the lessons I learned...

The Open Water Swim-

Before June, my major (and only) stroke was the "I don't want to get my hair wet" mom stroke. That means I've been freestyling for approximately 3 months at the time of the tri. I mention this so you may grasp that my less-than-fluid state in the water made me panic just a wee bit. Now might also be the time to mention, dear readers, to NEVER use the port-a-potties near the swim entrance. 

Like ever. 

Trust me on this one.

Anyway, I swam the 400m mostly breast stroke since every time I put my head down to freestyle I ended up off course. Apparently that line in the lap pool was more important than I realized.

The Bike:

I got about halfway through the 12m course when I may or may not have shifted wrong and caused my chain to fall off. Since my last bike was a banana seat, I have also been learning how to shift gears this summer as well. Apparently this is still a work in progress.

Fortunately, the bike crew patched me back up and sent me back on my way with a minor delay that didn't concern me in the slightest. At the end of the race, Seth was so upset for me that I had worked so hard only do have the chain come off and delay my time during the biking. To which I replied, "I'm a winner!"and trotted off to the car to pet my medal. 

(This, of course, became the running joke for the next two days as Seth marveled at how different we were. But really, I birthed three kids, trained through the Texas summer, learned to swim, learned to ride a road bike, and finished the triathlon. I felt like a winner even w/o the trophy. If we start subtracting minutes for each child birthed, I bet I could have been top ten...just sayin')

The Run:

So after you swim and bike then you get to run a 5k! Yay! While I am no speedster, I was definitely most comfortable here as I couldn't drown or break equipment. However, I should mention that it was hot this Labor Day and the run started around ten o'clock. My original time goals for the run devolved into a) don't walk b) don't hog all the ice sponges at the mile intervals. Both of these new goals severely tested my willpower, but I prevailed so that the lovely picture could be taken below on the homestretch. 

"I'M A WINNER!"*

(The lemon yellow tri suit was cause for many an envious stare let me tell you.)

At home and feeling good!

Uh oh, lack of electrolytes are showing...Questionable decisions are being made

*in my mind at least.

Birthday Morning

While I opted to have his party later, we still celebrated Wyatt's actual birthday morning. Monkey bread, a few presents, and the "you are special plate" that is currently missing.

All children of the 80s will notice a familiar gift theme here. Yep. They're back. Those heroes in a half-shell could be denied no longer. April O'Neil is no longer a 30 something reporter in a heinously awesome yellow jumper, but a young teenage girl (good move Nickelodeon). As a matter of fact, the feature film has already begun filming with Megan Fox as April O'Neill. I don't know about you but she was the FIRST choice I thought of to play the pre-pubescent human lead for a kids feature film. 

Way to go Hollywood! 

You've done it once again.

Wyatt could have cared less about April O'Neil but was super pumped about getting Dog Pound (which is the character Seth has taken to referring to himself as usually right before he begins to body slam the boys into the couch cushions)

"Hmmmm. Vintage Turtles. This will match my Vintage Alvin and the Chipmunks and Vintage Looney Tunes. Mom must be going through something..."

Yes you are my little man. 

Yes you are.

Loose Tooth Drama

What happens when your oldest type A child gets told by the dentist that her bottom teeth are starting to  "flex"?

The demand for "hard" foods and readings of "Fancy Nancy and the Loose Tooth" skyrocket.

Happiness is...

They call me the fireman...

SOME mothers must love their kids more and, therefore, plan super cool specialized parties. (Other mothers throw a party in a park for ALL the children on the same day and convince the kids it is so fun to share their birthday with all their siblings)

Well, we attended a fireman/truck themed party for (one more loved child) that kicked off at the fire station. As you can guess, BIG HIT with the young kiddos.

Wyatt scans the horizon for the telltale sign of smoke.

Yup. They let him squirt the hose. 

Sorry for the bad news but it's all down hill from here from now on son.

Sara: Haha! Look at me putting on all the gear.

Sara: Haha! Look at me about to pass out from the weight of the uniform. 

BTW I see you smirking behind me smug fireman. I'd like to see you give birth. 

Smirk that!

There is no fire too hot, not building too tall, no helmet to big for... FIREMAN WYATT!

After the station, we convened back at the party house where my shame circle was complete after observing the coordinating food and decor. My initial pride at having put on makeup and taken a FULL shower that morning was squashed. Good thing Wyatt had a great time with his buddy Atticus (who he insisted on sitting next to.) Great job Supermom Sara!