A Steel Cut Oats Day

I’ll admit it.

I’ve judged those moms. You know who I’m talking about. The ones that are wrinkled. The ones hauling 3.2 wailing kids around the store with their hair in a half-hearted ponytail trying desperately to keep order with her brood while choosing the ripest fruit.

How can I confess to judgment of these pitiful creatures? Because in a wicked twist of fate my put together young married life morphed into a fly-by-the-seat-of-my-sweatpants young mother’s life. It all hit home yesterday morning…

After reading an article about the lack of nutrition in quick cooking oats, I was so inspired to get as close to whole grain as possible I leapt from my chair, ran to the neighbor’s wheat field and began gnawing the stalks. Ok maybe in spirit this happened. Unfortunately for me, all my neighbor has in his yard are some lovely (but edibly questionable) flowers, and their consumption would surely drive a wedge into an otherwise congenial relationship while simultaneously causing major neighborhood gossip.

Where could I turn?

“Old Fashioned Oats that cook in five minutes,” you say.
“No! I might as well shovel sugar in their mouths and throw them in the sun with only 15 SPF!”
“What does the sun have to do with Old fashion-“
“DEVIL GET BEHIND ME!”

Ok, where was I? Oh yes, so I decide on what appeared to be the only nutritionally viable option available: steel cut oats (cue the horror music).

Now I have been burnt (figuratively) by these bad boys of the wheat world before, but, much like childbirth, all the painful parts mysteriously had disappeared from my memory. Two days ago, I placed my two cherubs in their breakfast positions and began to make what we will refer to as BATCH # 1. 1 ½ cup milk or water. Hmmm. Definitely going milk for the creaminess factor. Next, ¼ cup steel cut oats. Done. Third, bring to boil. Wait…a…second…Aren’t you not supposed to boil milk. By itself. Over high heat? Too late, I’ll push on to step four. Reduce to low and simmer for 25 minute. Ok, so I need to just..WHAT? 25 MINUTES! AS IN LIKE A HALF AN HOUR WHEN ROUNDING UP???? I have to BE somewhere in 25 minutes! Hence the end of BATCH #1 (sort of). I ended up revisiting BATCH #1 later when I had to scrub the scalded milk out of the bottom of the pan.

Hope springs eternal and yesterday morning I began what we will refer to as BATCH #2. There is a microwave option that consists of five minutes, stir, five more minutes. Easy peasy. I get a GIANT glass bowl (think 3qts+) with its coordinating lid. La de da, I’ll just go unload the dishwasher. When I look up, you can see what I did below.




Little did I know that the steel cut oats were only the beginning…



Stay tuned for “A Steel Cut Oats Day” Part II.